Happy In Bag

Thursday, August 03, 2006

I'm Considering a Move To L.A.

Not really.

It’d be an easy decision if I had unlimited resources. I’d buy a home on the beach just north of Santa Monica. Of course, I’d require both a driver and a helicopter pad. Alas, reality intervenes. Here are my notes from the past week in Los Angeles.

Here’s why I love L.A.:

*Economics. Employment opportunities for my "skills" are plentiful in Los Angeles.

*Vitality. Kansas City is safe but sleepy. Los Angeles is electric with energy.

*Beaches. As if sun and surf weren’t enough, spots like Huntington Beach are teeming with Veela.

*Food. Who needs tablecloths when the world’s best food can be had in every strip mall for well under ten dollars? Burritos, cheeseburgers, curries, wat- I’d be even fatter in L.A.

*People. Los Angeles is like a virtual United Nations utterly indifferent to each other’s differences. It makes you realize how backwards race relations are in Kansas City.

*Weather. Seasons are nice. But I’ll trade both spring and fall just to escape this Midwestern blast furnace.

*Flora. The fact that hibiscus is used as a pedestrian landscaping shrub delights me.

Here’s why I hate L.A.:

*Traffic. Intolerable.

*Housing. How can people afford homes that cost three to six times as much as they do in Kansas City? And rent is two to three times higher than it is here. It’s one thing if you’re a Hollywood mogul; it’s quite another if you’re a bus driver.

*Unsightly. With the exception of the hills and the beaches, the Los Angeles area is just plain ugly.

*Odor. Los Angeles smells like rotting fruit.


  • At 9:23 AM, Blogger FletcherDodge said…

    I've been on major trips to LA, San Diego and San Francisco. You gave a pretty good run down on LA. San Diego is Johnson County with hills and beaches (and immorally high real estate prices).

    San Francisco I love. If I had to live in Cali, it would be the Bay Area for me.

  • At 9:46 AM, Blogger Happy In Bag said…

    S.F. is gorgeous, Emaw. But the only way I could live there is as a homeless guy. It wouldn't be so bad, I suppose.

  • At 12:19 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I've had a strange (for someone who doesn't like driving) attraction to L.A. for the past year. I haven't seen much of it though, just the part around the school I visited. Alas, the school on the east coast gave me more $$, so I am going there. Maybe I'll move to L.A. after I graduate.

    >>"Los Angeles is like a virtual United Nations utterly indifferent to each other’s differences."

    You could also say that is not a good thing, i.e. oblivious to the living conditions of those not so white. While I think I get what you mean in relation to kc, I also think the '92 riots were not so long ago. Has the city really solved all the inequities, many of which are going to be rooted in race?

  • At 1:39 PM, Blogger Happy In Bag said…

    I think the biggest difference, Heidi, is the diversity of LA- literally millions of first and second generation people from Korea, Mexico, Russia, Ethiopia, China, Israel, Columbia, Thailand, etc. Sure, there are many disenfranchised people, but with a few notable exceptions (an Australian actor comes to mind), L.A. seems to judge people by their wealth and attractiveness, not by the color of their skin. That's not necessarily good either, of course, but it's a far cry from what we have here in KC.


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