Buttoned Up

Attractive women were checking me out at the grocery store yesterday.

A blonde offered me a captivating smile in the parking lot. A good-looking mom did a double take as she watched me select vegetables.

"Gee," I thought, "I've got it going on today."

A woman in tight sweat pants gave me the once over in frozen foods and a tall gal stared at me as I selected a loaf of bread. By the time the male cashier smirked at me, I figured he was just jealous of my undeniable appeal.

I couldn’t resist a peak in the mirror when I returned home. I saw that I’d missed a button on my shirt, exposing my white gut to the ladies of Johnson County.